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    How To Make Money On Theists, By Eternal Earth-Bound Pets

    This is a must read.  It is quite possibly the most ridiculous business idea I have ever heard.  And yet here a guy is, that has made$11,000+ so far.

    Basically Bart Centre started a business, Eternal Earth-Bound Pets, that is centered on the idea that atheists will not be taken when The Rapture happens and neither will pets.  This is how it is sold according to the Feb 22, 2010 issue of Business Week:

    “In this event, they say, the righteous will be spirited away to a better place while the godless remain on Earth.  But what will become of the pets?”

    And the website itself says:

    “The next best thing to pet salvation in a Post Rapture World.”

    “If you love your pets, I can’t understand how you could not consider this.”

    So everything about the site, including the name – Eternal Earth-Bound Pets – is focused on making pet owners feel bad that when The Rapture comes their pets will be left behind.  Thankfully for them, atheists will not be taken and, therefore, will still be around to take care of the pets.  But of course there is a fee for this.  $110 gets you a 10-year contract.  IF The Rapture happens in that time, the pets will be taken in by atheists approved by Eternal Earth-Bound Pets.  Otherwise you just burned you money, similar to any other insurance deal.

    It is very clear that Mr. Centre thinks that his customers are complete and total morons.  But, to his credit, the guy is completely upfront about his whole business plan:

    “I’m trying to figure out how to cash in on this hysteria to supplement my income.”

    “If we thought the Rapture was really going to happen, obviously our rate structure would be much higher.”

    I’m not sure how I feel about this whole thing.  On one hand it seems like the phrase “a sucker is born every minute” has never been more applicable.  On the other, if you really think that The Rapture will happen, and that your pets will not make the trip with you, this could ease your concern.

    It is the same thing that a tarot card reader, ghost communicator, or any ‘fortune teller’ relies on.  They, and perhaps their clients, know that they are completely making stuff up.  BUT, if, at the end of the day, the person with the ‘power’ has made the customer feel better, or given them hope, or given them something exciting to think about, has the person got their moneys worth?  I, for one, hate horror movies and cannot imagine why someone would pay to have themselves scared (and haunted mazes are only slightly better).  And yet there is no way that I can call the whole genre a scam because not everybody feels the same way, obviously.

    So do you have pet after-rapture insurance or is the whole thing a scam?

    This has been a Thought From The Cake Scraps.

    4 responses to “How To Make Money On Theists, By Eternal Earth-Bound Pets”

    1. Fantasy7 says:

      I don’t think it’s a scam, in the sense that people are getting exactly what they paid for. They’re not being duped, not having their personal information stolen or resold. I may be willing to call it a crock, but not a scam.

      It’d be a pretty busy day or two after the Rapture though, I mean, trying to make it to all his clients’ homes to pick up the pets. The only scammy thing about this is that I’m doubtful they actually would carry through with their promised pet-retrieval service were the Rapture to actually happen.

    2. @Fantasy 7 – In the BW article it mentions that he actually has people in something like 26 states that have to pass criminal background checks before he signs them on as post-Rapture caretakers. Oh, and they have to sign something saying that don’t believe there is a god. Otherwise they may be taken in the Rapture!

    3. fett22 says:

      The customers have to realize that they are completely being taken advantage of. I mean…they just have to. In other similar “scams,” the astrologist, card-reader, psychic or whatever tries to convince you that they’re NOT scamming you. In this case, it is just the opposite.

      Centre and his caretakers admit to being atheists. They have to even sign something affirming it. That being the case, they don’t believe the Rapture is EVER going to happen. (I know this is obvious to everyone, but I want to peruse what might be going through the customer’s mind.) Not that it is unlikely to happen or that it probably won’t happen in the next ten years, or before the pet dies. But they believe the whole concept is bonkers. So when Centre and the customer are making this transaction, I just like to hope for the sake of human intellect that they realize this. I hope they are just thinking to themselves, “I know you think I’m a nut for giving you my money. But you’ll see when the Rapture comes. And when it does, I’m trusting you to take care of my Fluffy.”

      Which brings up another quick point that the article briefly mentioned. I’m surprised that anybody that is religious enough to buy this kind of insurance would even trust an atheist, even if they’ve had a background check and the works. You’re not going to be winning any elections in this country with that label.

      We could also explore the high and mighty idea that humans have souls, but animals do not; that we are chosen. I’ll just bring it up and not go into too much detail. I debated a few Christians for a while just last night. They agree that evolution is a fact but the whole thing was sparked by God. Question: If it is the growing consensus among the (Christian) religious that evolution is true, we agree that humans and their pets share a common ancestor. How many years after the split did humans evolve the soul?

      I have no problem with this business at all. Being an atheist, I’m quite amused by it.

    4. @fett22 It does seem a bit odd that the people buying the service 1) feel that much connection to their pets and 2) trust atheists to care for them. But I guess that they could still think you are a good person, just that you will enjoy hell on earth for your beliefs.

      As for how the whole animal sole things will shake out, that is anybody’s guess. I like to pose similar questions to vegans that don’t eat meat because it kills animals. What about the souls of the plants? Why do they deserve lesser treatment than the animals? And how do you know they don’t have feelings? Perhaps they are just expressed in ways, or frequencies (or dimensions??) that we don’t know about or can’t understand.

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